Betrothel
On Saturday, Sarada Aunty and I went to a Christian betrothal, which is also known as an engagement. We drove 2 hours to get there; it was on the outskirts of Kerala where it is mostly village life by the water. It was really beautiful, yet life is very simple there. It was held in a very small church near the waterfront. Inside, there was a huge arch above the altar with intricate designs which was impressive. There were about 500 people that attended, yet the ceremony lasted only for 10 minutes! The service was in Malayalam, so I didn’t understand. Basically Sarada Aunty explained to me that the girl and the boy expressed their consent for their wedding in front of the priests and their relatives, witnessed
by a large number of people at the church. The wedding was already scheduled for a week later. After the engagement, there was a sumptuous meal for everyone who attended which is paid for by the bride’s family. When the wedding occurs, the groom’s family has to pay for the meal. Many families of the lower income group in the Indian society usually go into debt paying for this, and also for the dowry (a large sum of money given to the groom before the wedding by the bride’s family) that the bride has to give. If the bride’s family does not give a dowry, then there will be no marriage. Many of the bride’s families are in an excessive amount of debt because of the dowry system. That is why many people in India want to have boys and not girls because the families believe that the boys will bring more money to the family than the girls. People really spend a large amount of money for occasions such as birthdays, engagements, weddings, etc. For them it is a way to celebrate with friends and family, but it often leaves many people in debt. The church was near this waterfront.
The Movie Awards
Then on Sunday night we went to the Jaihind film awards. It was an award show for selected Malayalam film stars, which consists of the actors/actresses/music directors/ singers in Kerala state. I went with Sarada Aunty and her friend Leela Aunty, from whom we got free VVIP passes from (that’s right, VVIP not VIP!). Leela Aunty is a well known journalist figure in Kerala. She is known for her fierc
e writing regarding women’s rights, and for also being the first woman journalist in Kerala. Her status earned us 3rd row seats. I admire her because not only is she bold and courageous in her writing, but also in her character. She is a cancer survivor. The doctors told her she only had 6 months to live, and she vowed that she would not die. It was especially powerful to see how much she is respected everywhere she goes which was apparent at the film awards ceremony. I really enjoyed the film award function that night. There were thousands of people, which added to my excitement. There was also incredible music, beautiful dances, and I was able to see famous people. Of course I didn’t know their level of fame, but it was still exciting! Here is a picture of me, Sarada Aunty, and Leela Aunty at the film awards.
Dance
I also started a dance class in the city which combines dance and yoga. The instructor is Mrs.Geetha Mammen. The women in the class are in their 30’s and 40’s. Many people tell me that women in this culture rarely exercise. So they are surprised to hear that I regularly exercise. I could tell, because when I ran outside, many people looked at me funny! I really enjoy the dance class because it trains me to focus on my mind and body. We concentrate on our breathing, stretching, and moving our bodies to the rhythm of the music. After the class I felt very energized and empowered! I go to the dance class with another girl whose name is Leeza, which is pronounced just like Lisa in the U.S. Even for her, this was her first time to attend an exercise class! I enjoy the interaction between us because she is close to my age. It is interesting to hear her perspectives on different issues especially when we compare the differences between the two cultures that both of us live in.
I can’t believe the traffic here! I feel like an accident is about to happen just ab
out every second! The forms of transportation include an auto-rickshaw (which is like a golf cart with a cover over it), cars, buses, or scooters. The scooters are definitely the most dangerous because they weave in and out of traffic paying no attention to cars or pedestrians. The problem is that there are few signs or stoplights, and no one is ever in the right lane! Reckless driving is allowed; in fact, you have to drive like that in order to stay alive!
On Saturday, Sarada Aunty and I went to a Christian betrothal, which is also known as an engagement. We drove 2 hours to get there; it was on the outskirts of Kerala where it is mostly village life by the water. It was really beautiful, yet life is very simple there. It was held in a very small church near the waterfront. Inside, there was a huge arch above the altar with intricate designs which was impressive. There were about 500 people that attended, yet the ceremony lasted only for 10 minutes! The service was in Malayalam, so I didn’t understand. Basically Sarada Aunty explained to me that the girl and the boy expressed their consent for their wedding in front of the priests and their relatives, witnessed
by a large number of people at the church. The wedding was already scheduled for a week later. After the engagement, there was a sumptuous meal for everyone who attended which is paid for by the bride’s family. When the wedding occurs, the groom’s family has to pay for the meal. Many families of the lower income group in the Indian society usually go into debt paying for this, and also for the dowry (a large sum of money given to the groom before the wedding by the bride’s family) that the bride has to give. If the bride’s family does not give a dowry, then there will be no marriage. Many of the bride’s families are in an excessive amount of debt because of the dowry system. That is why many people in India want to have boys and not girls because the families believe that the boys will bring more money to the family than the girls. People really spend a large amount of money for occasions such as birthdays, engagements, weddings, etc. For them it is a way to celebrate with friends and family, but it often leaves many people in debt. The church was near this waterfront.The Movie Awards
Then on Sunday night we went to the Jaihind film awards. It was an award show for selected Malayalam film stars, which consists of the actors/actresses/music directors/ singers in Kerala state. I went with Sarada Aunty and her friend Leela Aunty, from whom we got free VVIP passes from (that’s right, VVIP not VIP!). Leela Aunty is a well known journalist figure in Kerala. She is known for her fierc
e writing regarding women’s rights, and for also being the first woman journalist in Kerala. Her status earned us 3rd row seats. I admire her because not only is she bold and courageous in her writing, but also in her character. She is a cancer survivor. The doctors told her she only had 6 months to live, and she vowed that she would not die. It was especially powerful to see how much she is respected everywhere she goes which was apparent at the film awards ceremony. I really enjoyed the film award function that night. There were thousands of people, which added to my excitement. There was also incredible music, beautiful dances, and I was able to see famous people. Of course I didn’t know their level of fame, but it was still exciting! Here is a picture of me, Sarada Aunty, and Leela Aunty at the film awards.Dance I also started a dance class in the city which combines dance and yoga. The instructor is Mrs.Geetha Mammen. The women in the class are in their 30’s and 40’s. Many people tell me that women in this culture rarely exercise. So they are surprised to hear that I regularly exercise. I could tell, because when I ran outside, many people looked at me funny! I really enjoy the dance class because it trains me to focus on my mind and body. We concentrate on our breathing, stretching, and moving our bodies to the rhythm of the music. After the class I felt very energized and empowered! I go to the dance class with another girl whose name is Leeza, which is pronounced just like Lisa in the U.S. Even for her, this was her first time to attend an exercise class! I enjoy the interaction between us because she is close to my age. It is interesting to hear her perspectives on different issues especially when we compare the differences between the two cultures that both of us live in.
Harmony
What’s interesting about India is that it is has so many different cultures and religions that live in harmony. I walk among Muslims, Hindus, and Christians everyday. Most people in India know what religion or culture a person belongs to by their language, dress, or name. However, it is not so easy for me to differentiate between them. Not only that, but each state in India has a different language. Most people in India know at least 2 languages, if not 3. Most people can speak their state language and also English. Most of the states also have a different language. Here in Kerala, all people speak the language called Malayalam. I’ve learned some functional Malayalam which helps me with the basics. I’ve also learned how to write a little in this language. I was forced to because all the buses to get to the city are labeled in Malayalam! It’s harder than I thought, because instead of having different symbols for each letter, this language has different symbols for each syllable. For example, I have to ride a bus to Aluva everyday. There is a symbol for A, a symbol for Lu, and a symbol for Va.
Fun
This is a picture of Angel Ammama. This is Sarada Aunty’s mother in law. In Malay
alam, Ammamma means grandmother, so that is what I always call her. She is one of the funniest people that I have ever met in my life! There is a reason why I call her Angel Amamma instead of just Ammama. One of the first few times I met her, I went into her room and saw a picture of her when she was about 19 years old with her husband (she is now 79 years old). I commented on her beauty, and she told me that she was the most beautiful person that she’s ever seen in her entire life! She went on to say that she was so beautiful that anyone who saw her fainted at the sight of her! Lastly, she ended by saying that she was an angel, and her husband was a god. I laughed so much! If I say that I don’t want any more food she looks at me and says eat, eat, eat more! I tell her I’m full, and she says drink, drink, drink. You are becoming a stick. Every time I see her she says to me, “You want food? I get you food, whatever you want I will get.” Then if I ask her to help me with something like locking the gate, she’ll say to me, “I am very old and very weak. I don’t know anything, I am going to die soon.” Even though she is physically and mentally in good shape for her age, she always says this. Her name means “happiness” in Malayalam, so I guess that fits because every time I see her she makes me laugh!
What’s interesting about India is that it is has so many different cultures and religions that live in harmony. I walk among Muslims, Hindus, and Christians everyday. Most people in India know what religion or culture a person belongs to by their language, dress, or name. However, it is not so easy for me to differentiate between them. Not only that, but each state in India has a different language. Most people in India know at least 2 languages, if not 3. Most people can speak their state language and also English. Most of the states also have a different language. Here in Kerala, all people speak the language called Malayalam. I’ve learned some functional Malayalam which helps me with the basics. I’ve also learned how to write a little in this language. I was forced to because all the buses to get to the city are labeled in Malayalam! It’s harder than I thought, because instead of having different symbols for each letter, this language has different symbols for each syllable. For example, I have to ride a bus to Aluva everyday. There is a symbol for A, a symbol for Lu, and a symbol for Va.
Fun
This is a picture of Angel Ammama. This is Sarada Aunty’s mother in law. In Malay
alam, Ammamma means grandmother, so that is what I always call her. She is one of the funniest people that I have ever met in my life! There is a reason why I call her Angel Amamma instead of just Ammama. One of the first few times I met her, I went into her room and saw a picture of her when she was about 19 years old with her husband (she is now 79 years old). I commented on her beauty, and she told me that she was the most beautiful person that she’s ever seen in her entire life! She went on to say that she was so beautiful that anyone who saw her fainted at the sight of her! Lastly, she ended by saying that she was an angel, and her husband was a god. I laughed so much! If I say that I don’t want any more food she looks at me and says eat, eat, eat more! I tell her I’m full, and she says drink, drink, drink. You are becoming a stick. Every time I see her she says to me, “You want food? I get you food, whatever you want I will get.” Then if I ask her to help me with something like locking the gate, she’ll say to me, “I am very old and very weak. I don’t know anything, I am going to die soon.” Even though she is physically and mentally in good shape for her age, she always says this. Her name means “happiness” in Malayalam, so I guess that fits because every time I see her she makes me laugh! Family Life
This a picture of Umma, she is the housemaid for Sarada Aunty and her mother in law who also lives with her. She does the cooking and washing, and usually stays from 11:00 AM to 4:00 PM. Most people in the U.S. would only consider a maid if they have extra money for one. Here in India, most people that are of middle class hire a maid. The people that are not e
ducated even with primary school education usually are hired as housemaids. Pramila Aunty and Sarada Aunty said they hire the maids because if they do not employ them, they will not have a job. More over, the services of the house maids help the working women a lot in lessening their stress from multiple roles. They said that the maids are a little expensive, but the maids help them out by cooking and also in return they (the maids) are able to have salaried job and can take food home, if they want to, for their family. Otherwise if they are not employed, they do not have any option besides prostitution or being trafficked or surviving poverty. Also, they are helping stop the cycle of unemployment for the uneducated women. How blessed we are! Even I have to attest to complaining about going to work and not liking the job because of coworkers, not enough money, or even because I had to go to work when I could’ve gone shopping! The bottom line is we have many options for employment, even if we don’t have a college education. Here, it is very difficult to find a job for uneducated mothers. There is no welfare system for those living in poverty. I don’t think that many of us could imagine turning to prostitution as a way to put food on the table. So let us always be grateful not only for our jobs, but also our education. In this picture, Umma is cutting up vegetables for our lunch. Umma and Ammamma are very good friends.
This a picture of Umma, she is the housemaid for Sarada Aunty and her mother in law who also lives with her. She does the cooking and washing, and usually stays from 11:00 AM to 4:00 PM. Most people in the U.S. would only consider a maid if they have extra money for one. Here in India, most people that are of middle class hire a maid. The people that are not e
ducated even with primary school education usually are hired as housemaids. Pramila Aunty and Sarada Aunty said they hire the maids because if they do not employ them, they will not have a job. More over, the services of the house maids help the working women a lot in lessening their stress from multiple roles. They said that the maids are a little expensive, but the maids help them out by cooking and also in return they (the maids) are able to have salaried job and can take food home, if they want to, for their family. Otherwise if they are not employed, they do not have any option besides prostitution or being trafficked or surviving poverty. Also, they are helping stop the cycle of unemployment for the uneducated women. How blessed we are! Even I have to attest to complaining about going to work and not liking the job because of coworkers, not enough money, or even because I had to go to work when I could’ve gone shopping! The bottom line is we have many options for employment, even if we don’t have a college education. Here, it is very difficult to find a job for uneducated mothers. There is no welfare system for those living in poverty. I don’t think that many of us could imagine turning to prostitution as a way to put food on the table. So let us always be grateful not only for our jobs, but also our education. In this picture, Umma is cutting up vegetables for our lunch. Umma and Ammamma are very good friends.Washing by Hand
The most important thing I learned how to do this week is wash my clothes by hand! Here in India, people wash their clothes with a special bar of soap or soap powder, and two buckets. Some families have washing machines. But expensive and colorful clothes are handwashed for preserving their good looks. They transfer the clothes from one bucket to another until they are sudsy and clean. It definitely takes some work, and once I got sore arms doing it!
Toilet and Shower
Also, the same goes for the toilet and shower. People don’t use toilet paper; instead they use a shower head spray to wash themselves after the bathroom. For showering, there is a tub of water in the bathroom with a cup in it to pour on you, but there’s no hot water! These things definitely took some getting used to, but it’s a great feeling knowing that I am conserving water by doing this and also that I can live without the technology. They believe that showering in cold water makes them healthier in the hot climate. Here’s a picture of me washing my clothes, you can tell it’s a hard task by the look on my face!
Mad trafficThe most important thing I learned how to do this week is wash my clothes by hand! Here in India, people wash their clothes with a special bar of soap or soap powder, and two buckets. Some families have washing machines. But expensive and colorful clothes are handwashed for preserving their good looks. They transfer the clothes from one bucket to another until they are sudsy and clean. It definitely takes some work, and once I got sore arms doing it!
Toilet and Shower
Also, the same goes for the toilet and shower. People don’t use toilet paper; instead they use a shower head spray to wash themselves after the bathroom. For showering, there is a tub of water in the bathroom with a cup in it to pour on you, but there’s no hot water! These things definitely took some getting used to, but it’s a great feeling knowing that I am conserving water by doing this and also that I can live without the technology. They believe that showering in cold water makes them healthier in the hot climate. Here’s a picture of me washing my clothes, you can tell it’s a hard task by the look on my face!
I can’t believe the traffic here! I feel like an accident is about to happen just ab
out every second! The forms of transportation include an auto-rickshaw (which is like a golf cart with a cover over it), cars, buses, or scooters. The scooters are definitely the most dangerous because they weave in and out of traffic paying no attention to cars or pedestrians. The problem is that there are few signs or stoplights, and no one is ever in the right lane! Reckless driving is allowed; in fact, you have to drive like that in order to stay alive!
